Fate in Flux Part 3: The Laws of Probability are Mine!

The Spire, the Comet, and the Yeti King

The meteor was now quite visible in the sky, and the party had little time to waste if they wanted to snatch the die of fate from the inverted spire. As you may (or may not) remember, the die in the spire was protected by a force field. Barko, the wizard in the spire, hypothesized that the comet’s passing would weaken the force field enough to let them grab it. On the way there, Äör attuned to the magical helm they’d just stolen, and learned that it allowed her to rewind time by one minute once per day.

The party parked the ship right before the entrance at the top of the inverted spire. Rushing inside to the room with the force field and the die, they stumbled upon Vaelthar, the wizard astronomer, and Barko. Due to the fate-altering properties of the deck of many things, Barko was now hostile to the party. Just as the comet passed and the force field began to flicker, everyone rushed for the die. They were all transported to some kind of demiplane consisting of a large round platform with an evil obelisk in the middle. How did they know that the obelisk was evil? Well, it attacked them with magic. Pilskki’s soul was also floating in a jar in there, so they made sure to grab that.

Unfortunately, the fight went pretty poorly and the party almost died. Äör used her newly acquired helm to rewind time and give the party a second chance. This time they killed the obelisk, Vaelthar, and Barko. They also remembered to bring Pilskki’s soul back to his body. When they destroyed the obelisk, it turned into a die, and they were transported back into the inverted spire.¹

It would seem that the die had been protected by a force field and an evil interdimensional obelisk for good reason. Without it, the tower began to crumble. Gore jumped through the window, and the others followed, their fall slowed by feather fall once more. As they landed on the ground, the tower fell from where it hung, crashing into the earth below and falling toward the party. Most of them dodged out of the way, but Gore decided that the most dramatic thing would be to run away in the direction the tower was falling. He just barely managed to avoid getting crushed by the tower. Nostralis, the guy they’d met the very first session who was trapped on the bottom floor of the tower, did not survive.

The comet’s strange magic had caused more chaos than just flickering force fields. Looking up into the sky, the party saw a whale way off in the distance, apparently falling in their general direction. Once it came close enough, Gore cast feather fall on it². After some discussion out of character, we decided that the spell only slowed the creature’s fall and not its horizontal momentum. So instead of falling right on the party, it flew right past them like a plane going in for a landing. And land it did, in a grassy plain where it rolled and rolled and rolled until it came to a stop, bruised and dizzy in a way no whale has ever been before.

Gore cast polymorph on it to turn it into a goat. Then they brought it onto the airship and threw it into the nearest lake, undoing the spell as it fell, turning it back into a whale crashing into the water with a tremendous splash. The lake was right next to the swamp they’d previously visited. Or at least, it used to be. Where there had previously been a swamp, and where the meteor had impacted, was now a city. Gore recognized it at once. Due to all the strange and random magic going on, the swamp had switched place with Yeti City—Gore’s hometown. They set the airship down.

The comet had crashed right on the edge of Yeti City and the lake, causing water to flood the crater and part of the city. The party’s first stop was the castle where they spoke to Gore’s mom, whose name I’m pretty sure was Curgin. She said that Gore’s dad, the king, had been somewhere near the impact and was yet to be found. The party went to investigate. They weren’t in much of a hurry, since they knew that Gore was the true heir of the throne, and his father’s demise would make Gore king of Yeti City. This is also why, when they found Gore’s father, injured but alive in a small flooded cave, they brought him back without healing him. They also took the opportunity to fight a giant fish, which had eaten a fate die that had been inside the comet. That brought the group up to five dice. The Velvet Phantom had one that he stole from the queen, and then there was one more.

But first, Gore had a personal matter to resolve. With the king saved (to a certain extent, he was still gravely injured and no one did anything about it), he headed back to the castle to confront his mother, and his brother Rugg, whom he had learned was really his half-brother. Curgin admitted to the whole affair and pleaded with her sons not to fight about it, but Rugg couldn’t stand the thought of not becoming king, so he challenged Gore to a duel. Gore accepted, and they headed to the town’s arena.

The battle had gathered a large crowd. Rugg, apparently a spellcaster himself, had brought his cronies to the sidelines of the massive amphitheater. The party, minus Gore, stood on the other side. In the center of the arena stood Rugg and Gore, about thirty feet apart. Gore wore his usual smug smile. He wasn’t nervous. This was my opportunity to bring out Gore’s most powerful shenanigans.

The bell rang, and the battle began. Gore won the initiative easily due to his time magic. He summoned his giant fly. The fly threw a small bead at Rugg. The bead was actually a spell frozen in time. Specifically, sickening radiance. A cloud of green radiation erupted all around Rugg, draining his strength and cooking him alive. The obvious move would’ve been to step out of the cloud, but unfortunately for Rugg, Gore had created an invisible force field around him, trapping him inside. Gore kept smiling, and drowned out of the sound of his half-brother’s shouting by humming like a microwave³.

Violating the rules of the battle, Rugg’s cronies rushed in to help, so the rest of the party did the same. Together, the party beat the crap and life out of Rugg and his henchmen. Then Gore, crown prince of Yeti City, used one of his wishes to undo the destruction of the meteor.

The Final Battle

The party had no time to waste. At least, I don’t think they did. Through means long forgotten to me, they came upon a rumor that the Velvet Phantom was headed for the Volcano that Apologizes. With that knowledge, the party took to the skies once more and headed for that very same volcano. They set down at the foot of the mountain. It probably looked something like Mount Doom in Mordor. They began looking for any signs of the Phantom and his men. Eventually, they discovered a bridge leading across a chasm of lava. On the other side stood three of the Velvet Phantom’s men. One of them was Pilskki’s arch-nemesis whom he’d met in a dream in the kobold soap mine while high on mushrooms. In the dream, the bard had been called Gustav after the DM, but Pilskki’s player decided that in the real world, he was named after yours truly. There was a brief battle, made short by pushing the cronies off the bridge. But Pilskki let his worst enemy live, and with a bit of magic, convinced him that Pilskki was way cooler and that he’d need to learn from Pilskki if he ever wanted to be a successful bard.⁴

The party’s new ally, and Pilskki’s student, Mr. Truly, led them through a cave opening into a vast chamber. There was magma far below, and a bridge extended forward into the heart of the volcano. There was a strange magic that made everything silent, which was a problem because just about all of Gore’s spells required him to speak. A part of the bridge was broken, leaving a large gap in their path. Without spells, the party had to resort to jumping and throwing to get across. After walking some more, they came upon a circular platform in the center of the volcano. Lava was pouring down from above into grooves in the platform, creating a lava moat around the raised middle section where the Velvet Phantom and his men stood.

There was no epic villain monologue. There couldn’t be, because everyone was still under the effect of silencing magic. The party quickly and silently deduced that a magical box next to the Velvet Phantom was likely the source of the magic. Äör hurried to the device and managed to deactivate it before the Phantom’s men could attack her, and after that, they stood no chance.

Gore turned his hourglass, and the Velvet Phantom and all his men were suddenly frozen in time. It would only last a moment, but that was all it took. It just so happened that they were standing on the raised platform inside the lava moat. With all of them frozen, Äör knew exactly what to do.

She pushed every single one into the lava.

The Phantom himself survived a few rounds, but his men all died instantly. The group managed to snatch the Phantom’s die of fate from his burning body. They put all their dice on some pedestals in the lava. When they did, a giant floating d20 appeared and attacked them.

I’m pretty sure the giant die fired beams of random magic at them. After giving it a thorough beating, it briefly disappeared, only to “come back, but nicer,” as the DM put it. This prompted Pololoz’s player to respond with “Like Jesus!” much to the confusion of everyone at the table. The party was now in control of all the dice of fate, including the giant d20, meaning they controlled the laws of probability. They promptly returned to Yeti City to recruit some performers for their circus. They found it quite a simple task. After all, they had all the luck in the world.